Kicking it into high gear

Okay, I’ll admit.  Between traveling around Virginia, being sick, hosting a friend who got sick because of me, and wanting to have something resembling a social life, I’ve been slow in my work.  It’s true.  I’d like to do more, and I have the time to do it.  I just need to make the damn time and stop being so lazy.  The big thing is meditation: I can’t stress how important it is to do it frequently and to practice it, but there’s something about sitting there that I keep wanting to avoid, even though it’s only for fifteen to twenty minutes at a time.

Instead, I sit for hours in front of the computer being unproductive.  Go fig.

So I’ve decided to make myself do something, some ritual, some conjuration, something at least twice a week beyond my normal banish/prayer/meditation routine.  I’ve got conversations to hold with spirits and mysteries of the universe to learn, and I can’t afford to languish behind and take things so lazily, especially when there’s so much awesome stuff I can do with a bit more knowledge and practice.  Looking around the blogosphere, I’m seeing all sorts of things that I could do and seem easy enough to do, if only I could get myself in the habit of learning what this shit does or what that shit doesn’t do.  To that end, I’m going to really make myself do stuff while I have the time and energy to do so.

Okay, that’s enough whining.  This morning I called up Auriel again, since at work the other day I drew up a laundry list of questions to ask him (and other spirits, when I get around to conjuring them later in the weekend or next week).  The connection wasn’t as strong this time around, but I could still feel something and I was able to communicate with Auriel.  Plus, in addition to having a number of things cleared up for me, I was able to call up Amaymon through Auriel to ask for an initiation into the knowledge of manifesting things through earth (it’s better, I’m taught, to call up an elemental prince through their elemental king instead of conjuring the prince on their own).  The atmosphere changed decidedly when Amaymon was around; I could feel Auriel’s presence shift outward toward me and around the summoning area, and then a much denser, more brusque and rougher feeling came into the area.  So weird.  However, things felt a little clearer with Amaymon, and I asked him to show me how things work in the material plane.  Things seemed to go fine.

I asked a number of other things, too, including what being immersed in the element of earth felt like.  It was trippy: I felt compressed, like I was packed tightly in soil or sand.  I couldn’t see, I couldn’t breathe, I couldn’t move at all.  It was like my limbs were being compressed into spaghetti noodles, and I was immobile and locked in.  That said, it was also comforting in a way: I couldn’t move, but I had no need to; I couldn’t do anything on my own, but I was supported and fortified.  I felt strong, or rather, I felt able to support and be a foundation for other things.  It felt cool, it felt soft but rough like a loofah, it smelled of soil and peat and salt and dry sand.  It was nice, except for the whole not-being-able-to-breathe bit.  I kinda freaked out a bit because of that.

So that was this morning, and it seemed to go fairly well (though I wonder if doing the conjuration on a Wednesday or in an hour of Mercury would have made communication a bit clearer, this should be explored).  I’ve got studying and contemplating like WTF to do this weekend on water and air, and a few more conjurations coming up over the next couple of days.  Plus, it’s Father’s Day tomorrow, so I’ll be calling up my old man and having a pleasant chat with him/bitching about how much my recent car repairs cost me.

Oh, one more thing.  If you’ve taken a look at the Designs page and seen the lamens for the elemental kings, you’ll notice that there’s a blank space in the hexagram as if the seal is missing.  No book, grimoire, or guide will show you seals for these spirits, my teacher doesn’t provide them, and neither do I.  Instead, you get the seals for the elemental kings from them directly.  Because the elemental kings are sublunar spirits, their seals are more mutable than those of the celestial governors of the planets, who are more permanent and stable; this is also why the governors of the planetary spheres have their names written in Celestial, while the angelic kings who are of this world have their names written in Hebrew.  Plus, there’s a good chance that the angelic king of Fire Michael is not the same as the angelic governor of the Sun Michael, at least because their roles in the universe are different.  This is all hinted at by the case of Auriel, who doesn’t have a corresponding planetary governor.  Thus, you use a seal which is unique to your connection with the angelic king that they give you and different from the seal of the planetary angel of the same name.  You can then draw this into the lamen where there should be a seal for the angelic king.

Oooh, pretty PDFs.

In terms of my work, I’m holding off on conjuring the elemental prince Amaymon, prince of Earth in the South, since I decided to do a bit of research on Amaymon in my chat with Auriel last week.  Little has come up except some stuff from the Goetia, so I struck up a conversation with a good friend who was once a member of the Open Source Order of the Golden Dawn (OSOGD).  I asked about whether he had any experiences with the prince himself, and indeed he did.  He was surprised, however, that I didn’t mention it in the context of the Abramelin operation.

So, he sent me a PDF copy of the Abramelin work.  Since then I’ve come across a number of other grimoires including the Arbatel, all free, all prettily and authentically kerned.  Now I have several more binders to take care of on my shelf that, with enough luck and time, I’ll eventually get to and through.  Maybe the universe is just prepping me for the future one day or something.

Lazinertia

So, I guess the initiation into the sphere of earth went well.  I conjured Auriel today again, and that’s what he said, and that I’m ready to move on if I chose to.  Itwas a more familiar, cheerful conjuration than the last time, and I’m unsure why.  Maybe because I used his seal and I knew something of what to expect, or that I actually looked at the crystal ball without shutting my eyes the whole time, but it was more friendly than last.  (He became more serious when I asked about conjuring Amaymon, one of the elemental princes, and said I could if I wanted to, so I decided to hold off for a bit longer.)

But if initiations into the elements affect your mood and temperament, then has it ever been working.  Earth is the element of stability, sloth, and melancholy, and apparently introducing it into one’s sphere/mindset makes one not want to do shit, I swear.  I feel like I’ve done so little these past two weeks since the conjuration, including slipping on meditation and studying.  To be fair, I was busy with romance and a few other things on the side, but even those were touched by melancholy and a kind of realism that’s uncharacteristic of me.

So today, I decided that, if earth is inertia and I was going in one direction, a swift kick into another direction is just what I need.  I set out to meditate to focus my mind, contemplate the King of Pentacles image to figure out about the form of Auriel and the elemental king of Earth, and then reconjure Auriel for a quick chat.  Not only did I get all of that done, but I even did a bit more meditation than I set out to.  I’m fairly pleased with myself, and I think this is what I need to get my ass in gear for the next few steps of this phase of my Work.

I’ll be honest, though.  If this is what happened from the introduction of earth into my sphere, I’m not looking forward to water.  Maybe my Stoic training will help me keep composure if a problem arises, but maybe, with Gabriel’s help, things won’t turn out badly at all.